They say (I don’t know who exactly, but let’ss assume for the sake if this post that “they” do) that baby chicks need the struggle of breaking through the egg to be able to survive. I don’t know if the baby chick struggle cliche is true but it makes for an appropriate opening in to daddy’s recent thoughts.
Kiko, the young one of the house, has been maturing…a lot. She walks, runs, babbles incoherent nonsense in an attempt to communicate, all kinds of new and exciting aspects of her growth have been bubbling up to the surface. As a proud dad I must say she is doing quite well. She is growing in body, mind and spirit. She is mature beyond her 16 months. But, at the same time, as I watch her grow and accomplish new things I am forced to spend an equal amount of my time watching and allowing her to go into places and situations that I know will cause her pain. Why? It is the only way she can learn.
We all know this don’t we? As people we know that the only way to learn is to work through the process of failure so that we can figure out what to do and what not to do. Certainly not everything requires failure and in a perfect world failure would enter into the equation but as it stands now, a lot of learning comes on building off of past failures, making little steps of progress forward to our goal. That knowledge is fine….for us. We ourselves know that if you fall of the horse you just get back on and keep riding. But, to have watch your kids do it, sucks!
I’ll give you recent scenario:
Andy: Kiko, hold daddies hand here or you’ll fall over.
Kiko: Nya Nya Nya Ba Ba pffffffft = “No, I don’t need to”
Andy: Please sweetie hold daddies hand.
Kiko: Screw that! I’m going to run…….I fell over and smashed my face on the cement……WAHHHHH!!!!
It’s terrible to watch your kids put themselves in physical danger and we all know that scenario as parents. The more frightening ones happen on stairs or on busy roads or other such places of danger. As parents, disciples teachers and Instructors we have to allow for our children to learn (within reason at this age) how actions have consequences. The more you put them in situations like this the quicker they start to learn. When you are lucky they heed your instructions before putting themselves in harms way.
I’ve had nightmares about Kiko on the stairs or Kiko diving skull first off the couch while I’m not paying attention. I, probably for the rest of life, worry about Kiko’s capacity to calculate risk and and choose actions accordingly. But as a father, an extremely limited father, I have to make a conscious effort to allow my child to go through the physical and emotional struggles that come with this life so that she may be better prepared and better Abe to handle the life she is given and the world she encounters.
Soon, the emotional dangers and the dangers posed by other people will become a necessary topic of Daddy-Daughter training time, but for now I’ll just try and keep her from knocking herself unconscious jumping off the loft in my bedroom.
Related posts:
Daddy’s Diary 8: Go Screw
Daddy’s Diary 7: The More The Merrier!?!?
Daddy’s Diary 6: A Year That Felt Like a Day
Mommy’s Diary 32 (Daddy’s Diary 5)
Mommy’s Diary 29 (Daddy’s Diary 4)
Mommy’s Diary 22 (Daddy’s Diary 3)
Mommy’s Diary (Daddy’s Diary 2) 14
Mommy’s (Daddy’s) diary 7
